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Inside Look

Yikes!

So… have you ever had one of those seriously mortified-by-yourself moments???  Well, I definitely am experiencing that at this particular moment.  I was just thinking how long it’s been since I’ve actually posted on here.  Sometimes, I drop in and I type something and then I decide not to post it.  So, it’s been over a year since I last posted on here I believe.  Anywho… I just dropped in to see what I posted last, and then I was MORTIFIED to see the words that came from little-ol-me on my last post.  Yikes!

I must have really, been going through a lot.  Wow!  It truly seems like I had those feelings way longer than a year ago. Well, I am pleased to say that I have definitely experienced the true healing that I was looking for. Abba has placed love and forgiveness in my heart to a degree that I did not know was even possible to expect from myself. My heart is happy and I am very thankful for everything!

I can’t wake up one morning without recognizing the blessings in my life.  My children, my job, my home, my LIFE, and oh-so important… my past. Honestly, sometimes we get so caught up in our own pity party and feeling sorry for ourselves and just plain lack of PRAISE!… that we fail to see what the blessings are that have been born of our trials. Thank you Abba for opening my eyes! And in such a gradual, enlightening way that I can’t even tell when this lightness in my heart began!  He is so AMAZING!

Don’t get me wrong, I have plenty of hard times in my life still.  I mean truly, who doesn’t?! But I have learned that no matter how hard it is, there is no pleasure and no benefit in hanging your head… there is every reward in PRAISING the Lord through all of your circumstances.  Especially the ones that are negative. There is power in the tongue… speak positivity and Light into your life and those things will be yours.  It’s the truth!

I can’t believe that it’s been over a full year since I last wrote here. Plenty has happened since then. I set some realistic goals for myself for 2011 and I managed to achieve them all. I’m very proud of myself for accomplishing my goals. However, I think that I would not have been too down on myself if I didn’t complete each one. My major overall goals was for progression.

I’m starting 2012 with that same overall goal. Beyond anything else, I want to keep progressing forward. No backsliding and no looking back, unless it’s for further growth of course. Most important for me, is the budding true peace that I’m experiencing within my soul. At the beginning of last year, there was a disturbing feeling of unrest.  Honestly, it was like a tumultuous storm was brewing and then raging deep within me. I could barely stay afloat mentally and emotionally. But the good Lord is true and He sustained me.

There were many moments in 2011, when I wasn’t so proud of myself.  Whether it was words I spoke, choices I made, or simple thoughts… I knew that I needed to grab a hold of G-d and not let go!  And it was throughout 2011 that the knowledge of my deep relationship with Abba was further impressed upon me.  It’s funny to me how I can so easily forget how real G-d is or how amazing and faithful He is, but time and time again… I am amazed and awed by Him. Most of all, I am thankful 🙂

I’m looking forward to progressing through 2012 and being more than I ever dreamed I could be by the time 2013 rolls around. My life is His and each day that I wake up re-dedicating my life, my soul, my heart, my everything to Him… He leads me to victory!  Be blessed in 2012!… I’ll write you soon 😉

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About Shan

I'm a hard working mom of 4 who LOVES to praise the Lord! My favorite things to do are spending time with my family and loved ones, cooking, baking, and of course... eating. I also enjoy a great conversation and meeting new and interesting people. I have an open mind, but I guard my heart. My philosophy is love and be thankful!

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